I remember Linus.

The Suz has been on a three and a half year campaign to get me to approach the holiday season with something other than fear and dread. There's a lot to fear-- my aunt and cousins sitting around the dinner table trashing everyone they've ever met, making me wonder what they say about me when I'm off in the kitchen getting more pie-- and there's a lot to dread-- the lengthy process of finding gifts for aunts and cousins that are nice enough to keep them from talking trash about me while not sending me into debtor's prison. And then there's the usual crap that everyone fears and dreads-- the weight gain, the gift wrapping, the lights that don't work.

It's hard to get your peace and love groove on when these things are hovering over your head.

This year I explained to The Suz that perhaps we could decorate The Fortress of Power with some tinsel and lights. Maybe that would work.

At the local Tar-jay we found a selection of tree options, and faced an existential pop cultural dilemma. Should we go with the small Scotch pine tree from Houseplants, or the silver fiber optic tree in Christmas Ornaments?

The fiber optic tree was shiny and brightly lit. The Scotch pine was, well, small and prickly. And we might kill a live tree.

But we remember Charlie Brown. We remember Linus.

And we hope we don't kill an innocent little tree with our good intentions.