The Manda Just Wants Some Production Value

I actually went to sleep at a reasonable hour, but now I'm awake can't go back to sleep. Really just want to hang out on the couch and eat savory thins from Trader Joe's. Watched an interview with Eddie Izzard, which made me happy, then I was flipping through the movie channels and read the following title on HBO Zone: "Alien Sex Files 3: She Alien." The TiVo guide added, "Scientists use alien DNA to create a hot babe."

Clearly it's going to be difficult to catch up with the plot here, seeing as somehow I missed "Alien Sex Files" 1 and 2. I tuned in during a poorly performed police interrogation scene, and I was riveted because all the dialogue had clearly been looped in a fashion generally reserved for Kung Fu movies from the 1960s. This of course leads me to wonder how bad the original performances were that someone felt that this particular re-recording of the dialogue would be an improvement.

My other viewing options on this fine morning include "Jurassic Park 3," "Rush Hour 2," "American Pie 2," "Angels and Demons" and the 2010 AVN (Adult Video News) Awards (on Showtime, of course). I should check the awards show to see if "Alien Sex Files" got any nominations.

There's an assortment of blonde women who all resemble Lady Gaga but with impossibly large fake boobs. One of these women also wears an eye patch, which doesn't make a lot of sense to me, but it's clearly a complex story. Aside from these elements, the movie mainly seems to involve nudity-- and people driving sports cars with gull-wing doors. There's also a fair number of scenes with people aiming guns at one another.

And now there's a scene with a phone call to The President-- they cast a guy who looks a little like Bill Clinton-- followed by an alien invasion. And then one of the Gagas disintegrates during another interrogation scene, cut to credits, accompanied by off-key accordion music.

Yeah. I need to take another Benadryl.